First impressions: Far East Movement (FEM) likes to get slizzered. Words that sounds like slizzered: scissored, lizard, wizard, Switzerland, blizzard, gizzards. So by the transitive property, this term has something to do with Swiss wizards who like gizzards.
FEM goes on to say that they are fly like a G6. Now, there are several things lthis could mean. The meaning is left up to the listener because a G6 is not a plane, as one would expect when listening to the song.. There is a G650, which is a private business jet. But this would mean that FEM is not being exact in their word choice, and this is a ridiculous conclusion. They are nothing if not clear. Afterall, who else uses the ultra-specific and never vague term "slizzard?" No one. No, I think the far more plausible conlusion is that FEM is referring to the Pontiac G6. This car, a symbol of elegance and American automaking superiority, has long been a car only purchased by the elite. The G6 is now a classic car, as production stopped way back in 2009. Only the flyest, the upper-echelon of class and culture would drive these. Yes, this song must be referring to the Pontiac G6.
He says that he wants 2 more bottles of champagne "because it don't stop." We can tell that he is very popular, because for Asians this amount of alcohol can supply several girls with a blackout level of drunkenness. He then says that when sober girls are around him they act like they're drunk. This could tell us that he hangs out with non-Asians who feel pity for him when he's drunk, the alcohol's gone, and the girls are still sober. It could also be that he got Martinelli's sparkling cider instead of champagne to avoid the associated Asian glow. I'm leaning toward the former. Going on this assumption, we can see that these girls are very empathetic. Knowing the guys are drunk, they don't want to create an awkward situation, so they too pretend to be drunk. No one like to be the drunk person amid a crowd of sober people, and these girls are very sympathetic to these feelings. We can surmise that this is due to his level of fly (so fly), which has been unabashedly shown to the girls when they were driven home in his classic G6.
They go on to say that they keep it gangsta and pop bottles at the crib. He then instructs the girl to "take that bottle to the head, and let me see you fly." He is a real gangsta, clearly. He takes the girl back to his house, where his baby momma has left his child "in the crib" so to speak while he was out. not wanting the child to feel left out, he pops bottles in the crib, most likely entertaining the child to no end. He then goes all Chris/Bobby Brown on her and whacks his mistress with the empty bottle over the head. This could be for any number of reasons for this. His alcohol-engulfed brain may think it is entertaining for his child. But the most likely reason is whiskey dick (or Sake dick in this case). His impotent rage led him to throw away his fledgling career. The final original verse finds FEM telling someone "to put they hands up". He has apparently pulled a gun on the woman who he hit earlier. This has gone from bad to worse to OJ.
This cautionary tale of the perils of alcohol takes us through all the steps leading up to an up-and-coming rap star throwing his career away for some dumb ho. First, he does not buy her enough alcohol. This leaves the young lady unimpaired and not comforting to her "slizzered" companion's situation. When he goes home and tries to involve his young child in the festivities, the sober women doth protest. He beats her senseless with an empty champagne bottle and pulls a gun on her. Unlike Chris/Bobby though, FEM has come out with this tale before the inevitable court case to serve as some sort of buffer to help with the upcoming negative press. If only Chris had come out with his anthem "Sorry about your Face," before Rihanna made big fuss about it. By warning all potential companions, FEM has removed all liability from themselves, ensuring they'll be around for a long time (Yay!!).
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